Every year during those glorious and precious-few carefree days between Christmas and New Year’s, I make a list of things I want to accomplish.Most of the items on the list are business related — …
Every year during those glorious and precious-few carefree days between Christmas and New Year’s, I make a list of things I want to accomplish.
Most of the items on the list are business related — ideas I think are fun, exciting and hopefully profitable that I want to explore during the year.
If I told you about those, some of you would be intrigued, but most of you would think I’m a nut.
This time around, however, I dedicated part of this list to personal goals I want to accomplish.
I decided doing this was necessary right after a momentary lapse of reason around Dec. 30, when I invented chocolate eggnog.
You should try it.
Here we are beginning the first full week of January, and I can report that a few of my New Year’s resolutions are already on life support.
I won’t go into too much detail about them. If you make resolutions, yours are probably similar to mine for the most part — exercise more, lose weight, cut back on the chocolate eggnog.
Some of my resolutions, though, are a little different.
One is to let go of the things I cannot control.
This is going to be a challenge. Right now, someone behind my house is running a chainsaw. They’ve been running it for the past four hours, and it’s not even lunchtime yet.
I complained about noisy leaf blowers here a few months back.
This is worse.
A few years ago, I diagnosed myself as having what is called a highly sensitive personality. Among other things, this means loud noises affect me more than they may affect you.
I’m not sure how much I can change this. It’s how I’m wired together.
But since I’m going to try, I guess this is where I should say, “Blaze up that Poulan, Bubba, and cut down everything in sight. You’re not bothering me one bit.”
Of course, if I did actually say that, he couldn’t hear me over the horrible, relentless, constant racket.
Obviously, this one is a work in progress.
Another resolution that didn’t get off the ground too quickly was not sweating the small stuff as I sometimes do.
I mailed a five-page contract to someone last week. I put two stamps on the letter to ensure it had plenty of postage. I even put a double-stamped return envelope in there to entice the person to hurry up and sign it and send it back.
Then I dropped the envelope in a commercial mailbox — one where you can’t go back and get your letter back out.
Don’t we all know how this is going to end.
When I got back to my office, I realized I had left out the page where the signatures go.
Since the signature page is pretty much the essence of the contract, I was fairly disappointed in myself.
What did not disappoint me, however, was the plethora of creative ideas I had to get the letter out of the mailbox.
The best one included a piece of string, a rock and rubber cement.
You know, I’ve heard those country club federal prisons aren’t too bad. I would be put in minimum security. Martha Stewart never missed a beat.
And I’ll bet if I were a model prisoner, I could even get chocolate eggnog.
(About the writer: Barry Currin is founder and president of White Oak Advertising and Public Relations, based in Cleveland. “Stories of a World Gone Mad” is published weekly. Email the writer at firstname.lastname@example.org.)
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